Tuesday, July 1, 2008

last night but then today

some stupid drunk girls woke me up banging on my door at 2am again last night. This is the second time since i've lived here and i'm mad as hell. mad as hell. i guess hell is mad. i digress. but the shocking thing is that i woke up this morning as planned and i prayed and meditated. I asked for courage to carry out my God's will for me and I visualized myself being free and not trapped or stagnant. I got some perspective but i have been able to stir up some pissy feelings about those drunk girls. I'm just going to wait and see if someone does it again and then i'm going to maybe call the police and ask how to handle it. I really don't know what to do and it interrupts my sleep. i don't want to cuss these peeps out and wake up my whole complex because they don't deserve to have a bad day too. i mean, why add more negativity. i prefer to pack goodness into the stream of life. On Friday, i was playing with sidewalk chalk with my little girl outside and I wrote some beautiful principles on the ground outside my apt. this morning when i opened the kitchen window, i could see the words "Tolerance", "Surrender" and "Acceptance". That helped me too. Today my depression is totally lifted and I don't know why but "mine is not to reason why, mine is just to do or die" --unknown

1 comment:

...love Maegan said...

I used to spend hours trying to figure out "why" ...then realized the why doesn't matter. It just is. You can accept it or not. (usually not :)